yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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