Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
