arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
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