Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
