Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
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