Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
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He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
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What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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