i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
