Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
