there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
