Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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