Dude my mom stole all your condoms
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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