i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
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