Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize