He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
