I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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