Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
