he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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