Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
