I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
