oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
