On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
