i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Randomize