I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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