I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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