I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize
