4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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