Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Randomize