is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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