Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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