My Higher Power is John Stamos
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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