Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
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