I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize