Already got asked if we're dating
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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