it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Randomize
