Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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