Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
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