You're completely useless in the revolution.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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