well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
So squirting runs in the family.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
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