Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
