She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
