My first STD was from a foam party
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
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