hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize