Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize