So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Too much gin, very little bucket
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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