Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I have post one night stand depression
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