Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
