i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
there was a trapeze. enough said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
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