Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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