We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
how does that bad decision feel?
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
