It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
