I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
